Commissioning Jimmy to make those smiley riot shields for the Sisters of Perpetual Resistance was like opening the Thames Barrier at high tide.
The Sisters got the first few and then there was a great tidal wave of blokes fighting over them. It was chaos in the studio – paypal kerchinging like some digital speed freak, yellow spray paint fogging up the airwaves, giant rolls of bubble wrap blocking doorways and tempers held together with little more than gaffer tape.
They sold out in less than 48 hours after going on sale but even then the phone kept ringing and people kept emailing for weeks. Grown men were pleading for them and one poor fellow even came hammering on the studio door in a fit of despair long after they were all gone. Bad Miss Bird took great pleasure in seeing good men weep over an opportunity forever lost. That woman sews a curious thread of sedition.
However for the benefit of all humanity and in the spirit of true kindred kindness we have now convinced Jimmy to make us more shields and they will be on sale at our online shop next week. If you are on the Sisters of Perpetual Resistance mailing list you will get the opportunity to buy one first. You can join the mailing list by emailing Miss Bird.
These new editions are more expensive than the first one but as you can imagine dealing in used police riot shields as opposed to buying up new ones from China is a dark and dangerous art. The smaller one is a rare early police issue and hard to come by these days but is still only a quarter of the price of a Gucci bag and infinitely more useful.
If we can acquire more police shields it is possible that we may have another edition after these ones and a few rare originals – however that will depend on who is rioting where and how many shields they discard along the way.
Go forth and make nuisance while the rain falls.